The Unauthorized Biography of Rosco P. Coltrane

When it's my moment in the sun, I won't forget that I am blessed, but every hero walks alone, thinking of more things to confess

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Location: Owensboro, Kentucky, United States

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Tuesday, July 19, 2005

That VBS Feeling

There was one summer when I was a kid that my mom sent my sister and I to almost every Vacation Bible School in town. My dad was always working and my mom had to go to work for half days during the summer. So she dropped us off at the one of the churches in town to experience the splendor that is having sung "Father Abraham" so many times that I was in my mid-twenties before I got that song out of my head.

It was really weird because for the most part we didn't know any of the other kids. My mom might have had a friend who was a member of the church and looked in on us. I was alone with my Bible, trying to figure out how to get by.

The funny thing was that the first few weeks were pretty fun. There were cookies and Kool-aid. Lots of kickball games that now hail in the sport pantheon somewhere between game 6 of the 1975 World Series and Professional Bull Riding.

But after a while, I realized that pretty much every church was using the exact same curriculum. It didn't matter which denomination. The Non-denominationals read the same stories as the Baptists. Everyone seemed so different to me, but everyone colored the same story of Jesus walking on the water.

During the latter parts of the summer, I could pretty much answer any and all the questions. I knew the stories. I knew the crafts. In fact, I think if I would have had a few more summers like that, I might have become the Michelangelo of pipe cleaners and popsicle sticks.

And every single VBS started the same. The pledge to the American Flag, the Christian Flag and the Bible. I don't think I have ever heard those last two pledges since those VBS days. Wonder where they went?

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