The Unauthorized Biography of Rosco P. Coltrane

When it's my moment in the sun, I won't forget that I am blessed, but every hero walks alone, thinking of more things to confess

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Location: Owensboro, Kentucky, United States

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Wednesday, November 23, 2005

I Bet It Was That Damn Cookie Monster

I buy the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette almost everyday. And no I do not need a subscription dude that knocked on my door twice trying to sell me a subscription.

I read the Sports section first, then I usually read the Northwest Arkansas Times (a sperate paper inserted into the DG) so I can read Boondocks, maybe I glance at the Classifieds and the Business section. But my favorite part of the paper is in the top of the NW Arkansas Section. At the very top, the editors always make a headline of the funniest and/or most absurd police call from the previous day.

Today's Headline: Caller Reports Cookies Stolen.

A month or so ago the headline was: Caller Reports Monkey Loose On Spanker Street.

You can't make this stuff up...

Everyday, someone is calling to report a stolen 6 pack of beer (or soda...), pink flamingos molested and vandalized, bags of leaves spread out over sidewalks, and people walking around talking to themselves.

And I, for one, am glad that they report this stuff. These days filled with war, dirty bombs, death, and the usual bickering, it is good to get a laugh or two when reading the paper. Lord knows there is enough bad news to envelope us all, but what can I say, monkeys running wild on Spanker Street makes me smile.

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