The Unauthorized Biography of Rosco P. Coltrane

When it's my moment in the sun, I won't forget that I am blessed, but every hero walks alone, thinking of more things to confess

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Location: Owensboro, Kentucky, United States

One Word: UNSTOPPABLE AWESOMENESS!!!

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Bluegrass Blues

After reading this story, I am not sure what is worse. Having a mayor not mow his grass or the fact that there is a town in my homestate named Blackey...

Kentucky mayor refuses to mow his lawn
Wed Aug 9, 4:14 PM ET
BLACKEY, Ky. - Mayor Mike Dixon posted a sign on the fence around his overgrown lawn. "There are more important things in life than tall grass," it reads. Dixon hasn't mowed his lawn since last year, and has declined offers from neighbors to cut the grass.

I wonder if this guy goes to Fancy Farm? (Most people that read that last comment will not understand that, but I am sure it made my mom laugh...)

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

How He Reacted

(Sometimes y'all just have to indulge my poetry joneses...)

His inbox beeped. And when he clicked over, he saw her name. How long had it been? A year, probably closer to two.

He read the subject line. BIG NEWS !!! His heart broke on the third exclamation! He opened the email even though he knew two things to be true: she was getting married and once again his heart would break.

He kept reading. He was a teenage in a bad horror movie, and they are all bad. Creeping upstairs only to be stabbed in the heart with a knife or a ring. The pictures were hardly visible through the tears that had appeared while the pictures were loading...

- - - -

His inbox beeped. And when he clicked over, he saw her name. How long had it been? A year, probably closer to two.

He smiled when he saw the email address. The smile turned into a laugh when he read the subject line. He knew she was finally settling down. In the pictures, her smile was more beautiful than the ring. She looked so happy, so excited.

The laughs kept going, for a minute or too, until he pressed the save button and the images disappeared somewhere on the hard drive...

- - - -

His inbox beeped. And when he clicked over, he saw her name. How long had it been? A year, probably closer to two.

He was beet red. Just staring at the subject line. The pictures popped open. All he could do was stare at the monitor. Simply enraged over a couple of pictures. He screamed because he wanted to be hoarse, he wanted to lose the voice that had said so many things to her. He could feel his blood circulating and all his blood seemed to be rushing from his heart to his fist. He wanted something, someone to hit. All he found was a door...

- - - -

His inbox beeped. And when he clicked over, he saw her name. How long had it been? A year, probably closer to two.

He immediately pressed the delete button when he saw the email address. He went about his work, and forgot. And went on about his day. Too many calls had to be made, too many decisons had to be made. A lot of meetings still left in the day...

Monday, August 07, 2006

God Hates (Fill In The Blank)


$33,120...That is how much of Arkansas tax dollars are going to a preacher who came to the University the past few years and tried to share the gospel by calling people sluts, whores and fags.

And while the state has produced a surplus during the past fiscal year, it upsets me that $33,120 is going to this man and not to feeding programs for the poor, or air conditioners for the elderly, or health care for people that are dying. Anything. I would prefer it go to almost anyone other than this guy.

I have seen these kind of guys around before. There are a few of these preachers that specialize in evangelizing and witnessing around Southern college campuses and have become quite infamous with their preaching using words our mothers told us not to use.

There are others that specialize in protest funerals and celebrating in the death of a soldier, a homosexual, or a police officer, a practice that I find so despicable that I am offended at the fact that laws must be passed to outlaw this sort of behavior.

But is saddens me more than it despises me. It saddens me because this might be the only impression some people have of Christians. There will be people in this world that simply believe that "God Hates (Fill In The Blank)." The same judgment that is being thrown around by these preachers, that same judgment is being cast back at all of Christianity and God, himself.

Why would someone want to believe in a God that only judges, only condemns?

Imagine being called a whore while walking to get lunch. Imagine being called a fag on your way to meet up with some friends. Imagine if the only thing you ever knew about God was that "God Hates (Fill In The Blank)."

And never getting to see a sign that says "God Loves (Fill In The Blank)."

I don't know. It is like a movie quote I like to use often.

"In all my religious studies, I have only come up with two hard incontrovertible facts: there is a God, and I'm not Him."

And since I am not Him, I will leave the judging to Him. I do know this though, no matter what, still, God is love.

First John 4:8 "Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love."