The Unauthorized Biography of Rosco P. Coltrane

When it's my moment in the sun, I won't forget that I am blessed, but every hero walks alone, thinking of more things to confess

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Location: Owensboro, Kentucky, United States


Thursday, January 18, 2007

Laser Cats 2!!!

Ok, there really isn't a lot of great skits on Saturday Night Live anymore, but the SNL Digital Shorts are consistently funny...

This past weekend's was very good...

And Kudos to NBC for finally getting on the Youtube bandwagon, after a year of removing unauthorized Youtube post they have started to posts some of their videos to help promote their shows...

Monday, January 15, 2007

The First Annual Roscoes....

So this is my 300th post, and instead of me working and slaving over another wacky thing that has happened in my day to day life or those deep thoughts that seem to spring up from this shallow mind, I am challenging my readers. I know there aren't a lot of you out there, but the few that seem to be out there are rather loyal. So, what has been my best post in the past 299 posts? What was the craziest? What was the most sentimental?

(Wow, just as I am writing this, some high school kid just sat down at the table beside me at Arsaga's and reeks. Not of B.O., but of Axe Body Spray. Googley moogley, that is strong. I think my sinuses just got 3rd degree burns. I ought to go over and tell these kids to lay off the Axe and go for women's deodorant like I do. Wow, trying to gasp for last breath....must keep typing...)

Anyway, don't let me down. In a couple of days I will post my favorites.

I Was Born In East L.A.

No, not really. But every time I go to a certain customer's location, I always think of this movie. The basic premise is that Cheech goes to run an errand at this warehouse and the INS raids the place. He can't convince the INS that he is an American citizen so he is deported with everyone else. I always fear this whenever I go to this certain location because I am one of the only people there that speak English.

The other thing that is weird is that every time I go there, I have a certain lady admirer. Now, this comes as no doubt to anyone I am sure. I exude hotness. Really, it is a curse more than it is a blessing. I can't help, really, I can't.

Anyway, this little Latino girl always comes over and talks to me. She always brings a translator though.

One time she came over and began to speak to me. I did pick up what she said when she said my "ojos bonita." Her translator said, "She says you have pretty eyes." I smiled and said I know. What I meant was that I understood what she said, but I don't think the translator translated that way. The translator and the little girl both blushed. They both said something really quickly and then ran away.

It always makes me feel uncomfortable have this girl fawning over me while packaging hot wings. I always try to be nice to people and chat with everyone, it is just part of my job. But I don't think there is anything in my job description about flirting with someone through a translator.

Today, she was at it again. Giggling and pointing. This time she just wanted to know my name. I told her, Lafe. This puzzled her, as it puzzles most Latino people when I try to explain my name. So I continued and said my name is Josua. She giggled and ran back off to package chicken. So weird.